"Porn Shoot Massacre" DVD (director: Corbin Timbrook)

Mild film that only aspires to be "dangerous"

I have little patience for this sort of thing. Promises, promises. I say, if you're going to go for such a balls-out, all-in trashy title, at least back it up with something of, well, substance. This lame exploitation film goes nowhere fast. The premise? A porno in the making is marred by a grisly murder! The girls are being picked off one-by-one. Interested? Me, neither.

The opening scene is of an obviously-enhanced porn star in the shower. She is killed by an unseen assailant. There is obviously artificial blood. That is about as "hardcore" as it gets. For a film with both "porn" and "massacre" in the title, this one lacks both. Sure, there are plenty of breasts here and there, but there's also atrocious acting, a lame, generic story, and less-than-stellar murders and blood.  "Porn Shoot Massacre" is mild all the way, never quite cashing in all of it's chips. No, thanks.

Lost Empire Films

"Exploitation Double Feature" DVD

Marginal set of trashy cinema

Pairing a couple of unrelated early 70s trash films, this double-sided single disc is marginal, at best. The first feature is my favorite -- the 1976 Joe D'Amato-directed "Black Cobra Woman (aka Eva nero)". Starring Jack Palance and the beautiful Laura Gemser, it's the tale of a wealthy playboy (Palance) who encounters a stunning exotic snake dancer (Gemser), who he eventually woos, leading him into her dangerous web of murder. Did I mention that Palance's character himself collects exotic snakes? With plenty of nudity and scenes of 70s-era Hong Kong, this is a curious little film that's got enough breasts and tantalizing sexuality to keep me interested.

The second flick is a 1977 Italian film, directed by Massimo Dallamano, called "Super Bitch (aka Mafia Junction)", and it doesn't fare so well. A dirty cop infiltrates a crime syndicate, and plenty of violence, murder, and big 70s-style car chases ensue. Nudity is at a minimum, but the soundtrack by the great Riz Ortolani is superb. 

So, win some and lose some, this double-feature set is, nonetheless, a cool (and inexpensive) find for exploitation fans.

Apprehensive Films

"Escape From Women's Prison" DVD (director: Giovanni Brusadori)

This 1978 Italian sleaze-sexploitation film isn't the best print, looking like a well-generated VHS copy, so set your expectations low. Never a great film by any means, Brusadori still manages to capture an element of pure trashiness with "Escape", so it scores some points for being, well, nothing more and nothing less. The Engish overdubs make it even more weird and somehow out-of-time.

Here's a story of a quartet of women who (surprise) escape from prison only to hijack a bus-load of young female tennis players and their coach and driver. Naturally, these tough girls abuse their hostages in every way, from rape to murder. One of the prisoners is a lesbian, so we get scenes of her forcibly seducing a naive young tennis player, while another sex-obsessed convict preys upon a non-consenting male bus driver. It's tits and ass galore, as these wild and unruly women flaunt their guns and boobs. 

The acting is pretty awful, as is the script, which is naturally little more than an excuse to parade out nude scenes and violence. All that said, I fairly well enjoyed this one. Just keep expectations low, and this little trashy film is a good, mindless way to spend an hour plus. 

(CFS Releasing)

"San Francisco Grindhouse Triple Feature" 2xDVD

This selection of marginal 70's-era sexploitation (aka early hardcore porn) doesn't offer much aside from a curious look at the depths and budgetary constraints of the era. Centered around San Francisco (in itself a hotbed of creativity and free-thinking since the sixties), these three films failed to impress me.

First was "Wendy's Naughty Night", directed by Nick Philips (who, oddly, went on to direct horror later in his career). This 1973 skin-flick was hippie hardcore at it's not-so-finest, complete with weirdly whimsical musical soundtrack. This one was a weird tale of damaged, but free-spirited Wendy, who supported an deadbeat artist boyfriend, but loved to frolic in the sack (when not with her therapist reminiscing about her lesbian inclinations). As it is, "Wendy's Naughty Night" is a mess, with flimsy plot, very little dialogue, and awful acting. And the action was nothing to remark about, either. 

"Siv, A Swedish Girl" was also the work of director Philips, and despite a mismatched audio track (bad overdubbing), this 1971 hardcore features a trippy psychedelic jazz soundtrack. Definitely a period piece, "Siv" is forgettable at best, with most of the "action" being mostly nude writhing. Poetic voiceovers are hackneyed, with amateur imagery and silly effects. Other adjectives I'd use to describe "Siv" are haphazard and disjointed. The murder-suicide "climax" is absolutely unexpected (and, I"m sure, off-putting to period moviegoers who simply wanted a good time), and certainly points to director Philips' future in horror, but it doesn't change that this is simply a bad movie.

Attached to the disc with "Siv, A Swedish Girl" are a series of Joe Sarno trailers, which fare much, much better. Seventies gems like "Butterflies", featuring the amazing Marie Forsa, are previewed here. The great sets and cinematography in these trailers make the feature-length films on this set look just heinous!

The third disc in this set, lest we forget, is an afterthought from 1976, directed by Tom Hofmann.This one features the always-entertaining Joey Silvera as a regular joe who, in need of some cash, takes a job as a porno star, much to his girlfriend's chagrin. Well, the girlfriend, played by Linda Wong, decides to "get even" by hanging out with some swinger friends, so you can imagine the obvious here. It's not a noteworthy or particularly memorable film, but the action does get wilder and steamier than the two supposed "marquee" names in this "grindhouse" collection.

All-in-all, some pretty forgettable work, and worthy only as a time capsule of the early-to-mid-seventies scene. 

(After Hours Cinema)

"Slave Girls On Auction Block 1313" DVD (director: Bob Gonzo)

Not sure where "Bob Gonzo" comes from, but from the looks of this micro-indie sleazefest, he's possibly from the porn world. But this softcore sexploitation film offers only breasts galore, and an overabundance of hammy over-acting, awful characters, and ludicrous sets. Not much to see here.

Not much to say about "Slave Girls On Auction Block 1313", either, other than it's a tale of a sordid group of kidnappers who auction off lovely lasses to the highest bidder. The girls do their thing (unconvincingly), flash some flesh, and that's it. "Private Dick" "Rod Danger" comes to the rescue, complete with sexual innuendo overload. This one's pure trash cinema, with no apologies, but it doesn't have the titillation or storytelling to inspire much more than yawns of indifference . (Video Outlaw/Alternative Cinema)

"Frauleins In Uniform" DVD (director: Erwin C. Dietrich)

Alternately titled "She Devils Of The SS", this 1973 Swiss sexploitation romps through a muddy storyline, but has plenty of "perks" anyway. Taking part at the end of WWII, a large amount of pretty young ladies are brought aboard the Nazi military to perform various functions, but the sex-starved (and often nude) lasses just can't keep their hands off the soldiers (or each other)! With tongues firmly in cheek, the filmmakers exhibit a plethora of breasts (and fur). Call it softcore Naziploitation perhaps, but "Frauleins In Uniform" is a fairly fun and lightweight film with solid sets and effects. And the often hammy acting is of no regard -- this is enjoyable trash cinema from a prime era. (Cheezy Flicks)

"Psychopaths - Sex With Hostages" DVD (director: Jason Impey)

This trashy, flaccid micro-indie out of England is pure exploitation, but it doesn't deliver the goods it promises. Following a pair of escaped felons (murderer-rapists) as they evade a pair of bumbling and hot-headed cops, "Psychopaths" features nary a single likable character, an annoying abundance of potty-mouthed "fookin' koonts", and far too many overweight Brits who perhaps shouldn't be acting in films ever again. Miserable!

The sex is rather tame, the violence flimsy, the fight scenes laughable, and the characters one-dimensional and uninteresting. I lost interest fast and could barely finish this load of bollocks! (World Wide Multimedia via MVD Visual)

"The Sex Merchants" DVD (director: John Niflheim)

Not quite hardcore, but a little more than softcore, this modern sexploitation is the tale of fetish photographer whose appetite for drugs and women put him into some precarious situations, and to the brink of self-destruction.

Of course, the journey couldn't be complete without plenty of trysts with hot models willing to do anything for the next photo shoot. Cash flow becomes a problem for our "hero", as he annihilates his income on cocaine and more women. We get plenty of breast-play, some mild bondage action, flogging, and some non-penetration intercourse. Interesting and watchable, though not always well-acted or scripted. Oh, and I can't forget to mention the wonderful retro-style orchestral score. Nice touch! (Independent Entertainment via MVD Visual)